If you haven’t been filled in by the world yet, Jim Carrey went on one of the most epic rants of all time and said something super profound.
“There is no “Me”. There’s just things happening.” – Jim Carrey
Then one of my best friends, Prince EA, took that statement to the next level when he said in his follow up on video to Jim Carrey’s rant…
What Prince EA says here is a truly profound reason that you cannot nor should not, try to control your emotions.
Controlling is another great term for forcing yourself to feel a certain way.
And because you are not actually the one who chooses feelings that your thoughts just happen and dictate your feelings based on the conditioning you go through, they cannot be controlled.
We think we have complete control over our emotions, when indeed we don’t.
In fact, one of the major causes of anxiety, depression and feeling overwhelmed is because we feel a certain way and we try to force positive feelings and emotions into substitutes for the negative or painful ones.
What we are doing however, is suppressing the emotions that naturally flow into us, and because we try to suppress them, they will continue to linger and go even deeper inside of us.
It, generally speaking, has to do with the mind wanting to be in the state of peace, pleasure or joy.
I mean who doesn’t want to feel good?
This want, this desire is creating a great amount of pain when you are not feeling that way…
“There is a time for being ahead,
a time for being behind;
a time for being in motion;
a time for being at rest;
a time for being vigorous;
a time for being exhausted;
a time for being safe;
a time for being in danger”
– Lao Tzu
There is a time for being….
See, the mind thinks that it has the ability to choose consciously by altering its perception of things and thought patterns.
But who is the one who gave you your mind, your perception, your perspective and why did your body receive this particular mind?
Everyone questions what is the purpose of life: is everything based on fate and/or destiny?
Instead of speculating, let’s just come to the conclusion that all is random, nothing is random, all is fate and destiny, and nothing is fate and destiny.
The bottom line is the human mind will NEVER be able to comprehend if there is actually a cosmic purpose to everything.
Presumably so but not ABSOLUTE KNOWING SO.
So what then is the best way to find out what is true, what is real?
It is to ask the question….
Who is the one that is observing the perception, the thoughts, perspectives, opinions, the likes, dislikes……………. of the particular mind that we carry?
Once you find this feeling sensation, you begin witnessing the gaps between your thoughts, you will see a neutral reality from within & without…
The ABSOLUTE KNOWING of what is real will begin to naturally flow into you and as this happens then the question ends whether everything is random or destiny driven.
In fact, that question only remains in the mind to keep it alive, hence it’s fear of death of no-mind or of no-thought.
Instead of trying to control your mind, your emotions, and your feelings, let them be as they are and start paying super close attention to the gaps, to the space that allows for those emotions and feelings to happen….
It is here in the feeling aware presence that can serve your mind and let your mind better serve your being…
In fact, positive thinking may be actually hurting you because it, often times, is developing new belief systems in you, which are going against your most natural feelings and intuition.
“Think this way, feel this way, act this way and you will feel better.” – Sincerely positive thinking…
Which is turning us into mechanical animals, into robots and zombies…
As opposed to us feeling everything that is going on inside of us and embracing the hell out of that emotion or feeling for what it is…
Accepting the “what is” of your emotions in that moment is another way of saying accept the happenings of life…
You cannot, however, accept “what is” by thinking about it. Thinking is based in time, in past and future.
If you’re going through pain right now, what thinking will do is think of a moment that was better or anticipate getting out of this moment into a better one.
This is why thinking equals resistance.
Accepting “what is” must happen on the level of the body, through the direct feeling sensation and staring directly into the face of that particular feeling.
No matter how utterly unbearable this may seem…
“The only way out is through.” – Robert Frost
In fact no matter how unbearable it may seem, your suffering can never survive in the face of pure presence.
Thinking about it, however, will only cause that pain and suffering to go even deeper.
Instead of trying to explain the way you’re feeling with mental judgments, just feel the sensations in any given moment fully and absolutely without needing to get out…
See your emotions that happen in the brilliant way that Lao Tzu suggests in the Tao Te Ching…
“If you want to shrink something, you must first allow it to expand. If you want to get rid of something, you must first allow it to flourish. If you want to take something, you must first allow it to be given. This is called the subtle perception of the way things are.”
Essentially what Lao Tzu is saying here is…
If you want to gain total control, then you MUST LOSE total control!
Don’t mistake losing control to not caring, or of giving up though; think of more like as you lose control, you let down your guards of needing to feel differently, and, thus, you allow awareness to come in.
Lose the thought that you’re in control, don’t need to be in control and surrender to what is.
Allow everything, even your ego to just jump out of your skin; just watch it with neutral awareness….
If you want to transcend the ego (Who I am is my thoughts/emotions) to some extent, then you must not care that all humans have one and that it is necessary to keep yourself from suppressing our imperfect nature….
The ego can only cause us the most harm when we identify who we are with thought and with feeling and try to force away those feelings….
“You cannot destroy the ego. You must love it to death.” – Bentinho Massaro
This is to not let your ego slide whenever it wants to, but to be in a continuous watching of your mind-made thoughts in any given situation.
When you are stuck in an illusion or belief system, don’t sweat it, because it will eventually cause you the pain necessary to teach you out of the pain.
We don’t know what we don’t know, so why sweat it?
Let the world be a mystery, let your emotions be a complete mystery, embrace and accept that perfect mystery.